On a Monday morning, I woke up sweating from a dream that seemed so real. I don’t know exactly what happened in it, but I know I saw Leo. Just when I thought I might start getting it together, I feel like I was about to relapse into a panic attack.
Why is this happening? After all the progress I’ve made at the meetings. Well, I still have yet to open up in there, but I don’t think it will be long now.
On a positive note, Matt spoke last week. He didn’t say much, but it was more than he had been doing. Courtney called me the other day to tell me he is starting to come around. “Mia, I can’t thank you enough.”
“Why are you thanking me?”
“Well, he said you encouraged him not to give up!” she exclaimed.
I don’t even know what to say. “If you asked me, Matt is the one encouraging me.”
“Thanks, Mia. See you at the dance academy later.” “Yes, see you then, Courtney.”
I was happy for Matt and Courtney. I am sure Leo would be happy to know he was getting help. As I leaned back against the side of my bed, my mind reverted to the dream, and I started worrying. I was aware of how depression was one of the stages of grief.
What if it would hit me again and no one could pull me out of it? That’s not to say it’s not hard to get up every day. It is. Still, I am determined. Besides, I’ve already caused my parents pain.
I owe it to them. I decided to get dressed and meet up with Courtney. Mom and Dad were excited to hear I’ve decided to go back and teach dance. Courtney said Madame Alicia asked about me and wanted to offer me a job. I couldn’t think of a better time than the present to begin.
Since Madam Alicia had two other dance schools she really relied on us.
After all, my plans to head off to New York seem to have been made a lifetime ago, and I really did not think I could go now, anyway. I’m so confused.
Where do I go from here?